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Sunday, September 14, 2008

The "What's your Beef" International

Heard from China: Shiskabob is BEEF on a stick? BEEF?? What kind of weirdo does that?

Heard from Texas: Hey Ya'll, I'm not that hungry tonight. Just give me the 60 ounce T Bone.

Heard from Canada: It ain't the cow that's mad now, you American assholes!

Heard from New Zealand: You slaughtered the what? Yea, that's fine, as long as the lamb is still ok. I'm feeling kind of horny tonight.

Heard from India: Yes, our hospitality is legendary here. Yes, we treat our guests like cattle!

Heard from Ethiopia: I don't care WHAT it is, do you have any more?

Heard from Japan: Just slice it up, wrap it in seaweed and call it red snapper. They'll never know.

Heard from Sweden, Circa 5000 B.C.: And you can even put the horns on your hat, like so.

Heard from Jamaica: What is the matter wit you? You can't get high offa that! Put it down!

Heard from Alabama: We only kill the brown ones.

Heard from Israel: Mordechai, you can eat that. It doesn't have cloven hooves.

Heard from Palestine: Did you hear that? They like cows! Strap a bomb on one and send it in!

Heard from the Polynesian Islands: Hey! Where's the beef!

10 keen observations:

singlendacity89 said...

YOUR ASS IS CRAZZZZZZZZZZZZY!!!!!

Love ya man!!!!

HAHAHAHHAHAHA!


P.S. Tomato is gone.. get rid of it on your blogroll babe and ummmmmm update my word pres!! Damn I am demanding! haha

Miss Milk said...

My favourite is a toss up between New Zealand and Alabama. Ahaha... so true.

Mike said...

Single - my brain is crazy. My ass is hairy.

Also, the link is updated, the name stayed the same. What would you like the name changed to?

milk: I figgured you might like the New Zealish one ;)

Knight said...

Your water site is down. I can't read my answer!!!

Technodoll said...

The Palestine one deserves a medal. Oh man! What do you smoke?

Mimzie Beaumont said...

Hysterical!!!!

Hungry Mother said...

For a vegetarian such as moi, that was like being waterboarded.

Hungry Mother said...

For a vegetarian such as moi, that was like being waterboarded.

Tink said...

LOL @ the Jamaican. I think you might have been smoking something when you wrote this. ;)

Indrani Bhattacharya said...

Mike,

""Yes, our hospitality is legendary here. Yes, we treat our guests like cattle!""
That was hilarious!! :-D

There's another joke on India's supposedly high vegetarian quotient;
Asks a foreign visitor to an Indian ""Is everyone vegetarian in India?""
Indian guy ""Yes. Even tigers are vegetarian in India"".

Indians eat non-vegetarian food by the millions. Many Hindus eat beef as well and I see nothing wrong in this, as ancient Indians did include oxen flesh in their diet.