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Friday, September 28, 2007

My Dog's Bum

It started with scratching. My dog would stand on three legs and use the other one to scratch her belly, then alternate. Then she started scratching her head. Then she started chewing on her bum.

I didn't pay it much regards. I mean, dogs lick themselves down there all the time, right? After all, as much as anyone will never admit to this, if ANYONE had that kind of flexibility they wouldn't ever leave their house, at least at first.

The chewing of the bum became more and more frequent. She started getting pretty irritable, and when her 17.5 lb self tried to beat up a rottwieller, I thought it was time to take her to the vet.

My dog loves the vet. She thinks it's the greatest place ever, so many animals, so many smells, oh boy! But this particular visit was to become a bit of a rude awakening.

The vet said that it could be her glands, many small breed dogs have gland problems. I had no idea how they were to check for this but I was about to find out.

First thing that happened to her was a thermometer went up her bum. What's with that? When was the last time you had a thermometer up the bum? That hasn't happened to me since I was very young - and it wasn't long before it went under my tongue instead. You know, thinking about that, my mom only ever kept one thermometer in the house..... but I digress. If doctors have thermometers for people that you put in an ear and it gets a temperature almost instantly, why not dogs? Are vets sadists?

The vet then proceeded to check her glands. A glove went on, and a big dob of clear lubricant went on her fingers. "That's not going where I think it is, is it?" I said, but it was. So I grabbed my dog and said "Jinx, brace yourself....."

The vet wasn't a big person. She's maybe 5 foot 7" and maybe 120 lbs, and has fingers sized accordingly. I told her I'm glad she wasn't a 300lb man, but to a 17lb dog, she might as well have been. Jinx, for the first time in her little life, had an expression of genuine surprise, shock and dismay on her face.

When it was all said and done, it turned out she had fleas. Frig, stupid fleas. Apparently, fleas prefer an animals hind quarters, hence the chewing on the butt. Little bastards. My instructions were to put flea medication on her, wash all the surfaces she sleeps on, (have you ever put a pillow in a washing machine? Not fun), vacuum the entire house, put the contents of the cleaner in a garbage back and get rid of it, then fumigate the house with a big can of pesticide. Oh, and after I fumigate I need a place OTHER than the house for Jinx and I to be for the day. All in good fun.

From here on in, Jinx will be getting flea treatments on a regular basis.

When the vet was done, I got my $140.00 bill. The dog wasn't the only one to have an expression of genuine surprise, shock and dismay on their face that day.

6 keen observations:

Anonymous said...

Yes, it is possible to get an accurate temp from a dog's ear, and yes, it is done. Our vet takes the temp from the ear. Much easier and happier for all concerned.

Ppoor Jinx and Mike. Better hope we get an early and cold winter. No chance of fleas then.

Quinn said...

You know what they say Spaz.
The only difference between a rectal and an oral thermometer is the taste.

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